Month: January 2023

Time can go by so fast when we’re trying to get a lot of things done, especially when we’re on a time crunch. It’s like every minute we think that has past was actually five minutes in real time. And when time is up, it’s like that last hour or two was a blur–fractions of moments and events that, when added up, only come out to a few minutes.

When I say to myself, “Where did the time go?” it’s usually toward the end of the day. At the end of the day, we can rest, reflect on what transpired from morning till evening. It all seems episodic, like clips from a movie trailer in which we remember the highlights, but don’t actually remember being at those specific scenes. The time flew by so fast that we thought we had blinked and missed something, but the reality is that our experience of time is more like a daydream than a detailed account on a ledger or in a book.

Each day, time marches forward, never backwards. We can’t rewind it and correct our mistakes, nor can we rewind it to analyze how we experienced the past. All we have are memories of it, but even they are just interpretations based on our mode of perception at each and every moment.

That saying, “Where did the time go?” is paradoxical, since we know where it went: it goes forward–forward in the sense of transitioning from the present to the future. But what we mean when we ask ourselves that is how did we lose track of time, why did we spend so much of it trying to get things done, trying to do everything at once, when all we wanted was a break?

Thursday is one of those odd days of the week where it’s not quite in the middle, nor at the end, but somewhere in-between. On Friday, everybody’s excited for the weekend, excited that they get two days off and can sleep in, stay up late, hang out with friends without worrying about tomorrow.

But Thursday is one of those days where one can’t do any of those things, since there’s still one day of work left. It’s a day that seems like every other day, but it’s not. People know the weekend is coming, that the work week is almost over, so it’s like they’re prepping for it mentally, anticipating the last day of work before the weekend.

And knowing that, they try to wrap things up at work, preorder movie tickets, stock up on groceries, or reserve tables at a restaurant for a get-together. They might even work on getting all of the chores done so that they don’t have to do them over the weekend. It’s like a day that calls for us to finish what we’ve started that week, as well as to make arrangements for social gatherings. In fact, Thursday might be one of the busiest days of the week.

In a way, we’re all treasure hunters. Aside from the archetypical treasure hunter who searches for gold in a sunken ship at the bottom of the ocean or in some long forgotten cave, the modern treasure hunter is searching for items of practical use, such as a good deal on a car or a home, or those rare collectibles at the best and most reasonable price.

It could be conjectured that it’s inherent in our nature to be treasure hunters. Ever since the dawn of humankind, humans have been searching for resources, raw materials, and knowledge to better and advance life. The intellectual treasure hunter is one who seeks out the secrets of nature, whether that’s in physics, chemistry, or biology. Those that search for raw material, such as gold, zinc, silver, etc., excavate mines, hollow out craters on the earth’s surface, or explore planets or rocks, such as the moon, in search of unknown material. And in our modern age, those that are on the hunt for resources, which can span the gamut from collectibles to supplies and food, are in search of the best products/brands at the best prices.

Indeed, one can search for hours or days to fill up their treasure chest given the examples above. It harkens back to this instinctive need that has existed centuries and millenniums ago, where survival was dependent on it. It’s what drives us to explore, to search for hours and days, to persist despite the obstacles in order to acquire the treasure we’ve dreamed of. It could be a car, a house, a boat, or something as small as a coin, a comic, a rare book, an autographed item, memorabilia, etc. Treasure hunters are always on the prowl, and will be for centuries to come.

It’s a strange phenomenon to drop something on the ground–especially if the ground is of the same likeness as the object we dropped. Because of this, what should’ve been found in five seconds ends up taking five or ten minutes. In the worse case scenario, we end up not finding it at all.

When we first drop an item, such as a coin, we look directly below us–down near our feet. Then we expand the radius of our search, inferring that it could’ve rolled to our left, or maybe to our right. It ends up taking so much time that we come to the conclusion that it’s not even worth it, but because we had already started, we don’t want to give up that easily. And once we do find it, we end up surprised that we found it all, since it was camouflaged by the ground as if it was trying to hide from us.

But that object could’ve been anything: a bottle cap, a piece of jewelry, a contact lens, a paper clip, a key, the list goes on. It’s like our brains–our eyes–weren’t made to efficiently search for dropped items. It takes a great deal of effort to find them, which can include kneeling down and sweeping our hands over the floor, turning on multiple lights, walking in circles in the same area, sweeping that area with a broom, etc.

When we do find the item, it’s like we’ve solved a complex math problem or aced a test. There’s a huge sense of relief that immediately fills us, changes our mood from one of panic and anxiety to optimism and hopefulness.

It’s a curious thing to see how we are flexible on some things, but unwavering on others. For example, we’re flexible when it comes to things that we don’t regard with a high degree of importance. For some, that could be choosing what to eat for dinner or what movie to watch on a Friday night, but for others, these things could be nonnegotiable. In their minds, they won’t waver when it comes to the alternatives or suggestions that someone else might offer.

To a certain degree, we’re like this in some area or other. Maybe it is in regards to how food should be prepared and cooked, what makes a good movie or book, our views about life, or about the way things should be done in our line of work. In a way, being unwavering can be a positive, since it’s indicative that we believe in our values and will stay true to our principles.

But being flexible is a part of life too, since it’s obvious that not everyone shares our ideas, agrees with them, not to mention that they might have different ideas of how something ought to be done. The middle ground is in knowing when to be flexible (and how flexible) in regard to change or what’s unfamiliar, and knowing when to be unwavering with our ideas and principles. I don’t think there’s an easy answer to this, but one thing I’ve learned over the years is that it’s always good to listen and hear what the other person has to say before making an unwavering conclusion.

I find that late afternoon naps create more urgency than morning or early afternoon ones. If I take a nap around the afternoon and wake up one or two hours later, I still have plenty of time to get things done, such as to make lunch, write, etc. But if I take a nap around 5 PM or 6 PM and wake up at 8 PM or 9 PM, there’s very little time left to get things done with the day coming to a close.

In fact, it creates more urgency because whatever chores are left need to be done right away. I can’t take my time and work on them throughout the day, or space them out. I have to do them one right after the other before I have to go to sleep. But if I’m extremely tired after a nap and just want to go back to sleep, I’ll set those things on the agenda aside for tomorrow.

Naps are one of those things that we don’t plan on but happen due to tiredness or exhaustion. Sometimes it just happens when I close my eyes as I’m watching TV and then I find myself waking up one or two hours later. It’s a strange feeling where it seems like the day has passed when it hasn’t, or when it seems like we only slept for a half-hour when several hours had passed. It’s like our bodies needed to catch up on missed-hours-of-sleep, or at least to recuperate its energy back.

In general, naps do a weird thing where it disrupts our routines and plans. We have to adapt ourselves around them, adjust to the limited time we have after we wake up. But I’ve also come to accept that they can be beneficial and even necessary, since they’re indicative of our minds and bodies telling us something: that rest is just as vital as being awake.

In the morning, I look forward to making coffee, since it helps wake me up, and during the winter months, it keeps me warm. But the more I drink of it throughout the day, the less I want to drink it, since it starts to lose its flavor and begins to taste bitter.

During the late morning and afternoon hours, I usually drink water, or something sweet and refreshing like iced tea or maybe a smoothie (if I’m in the mood for it). But during the evening hours, my taste buds crave coffee again. I hold off on making it since I like to drink water or iced tea with dinner.

I’ve drank coffee at night before, which has given me some trouble with going to sleep at my scheduled hour. I’ve tried drinking hot tea as a substitute, although that has given me trouble going to sleep as well. On a successful night, I’ll occupy my mind with a game of chess or write a post or watch a movie so that I don’t think about coffee. Sometimes I’ll just force myself to drink a cup of water if I’m craving coffee. But the one rule I always have to remind myself is: if I drink coffee at night, I won’t be able to sleep.

Often in life, I find that I have to make rules for myself to keep myself disciplined, focused, and consistent. It’s not enough that I just make something a habit, but I have to have a rule in my mind that says: “Don’t do it, or else . . .,” which functions as a reinforcement to the deterrent.

I remind myself that coffee time is in the morning, that if I drink it at night, I won’t be able to go to sleep. The same could be said with many other things, such as watching a movie past a certain hour, reading a book late at night, or completing work in the evening when I should save it for tomorrow (all of which keep me up until the wee hours). There’s a time and place for everything, but sometimes our want of something (such as the things listed above) try to supersede our rules by generating rationalizations that trick our minds into giving in.

For me, the rules, in conjunction with good habits, is a way to stay unperturbed and disciplined. But that doesn’t mean it’s always easy. For each person, it takes figuring out what the rules are (not to mention refining them), and what habits we can practice consistently that will make us successful.

I remember in college one evening driving around to find a place to eat with a friend. We drove from restaurant to restaurant, only to discover that the wait-times were somewhere between forty-five minutes to an hour at each one. We continued to drive further away from campus (this was in Richmond, VA), until we finally gave up (since we were about thirty to forty minutes away from campus) on a casual dining restaurant and settled on fast food.

That was many years ago, and now, if I wanted to go out to a restaurant, one, I’d probably quit after the first restaurant that told me the wait-time was forty minutes, and two, I’d go back home and just raid my pantry to make something to eat. I think there comes a point where you’ve maxed out on the experienced of eating out, and you’re content with making food at home. At least, that how it is for me.

When I make food at home, depending on the mood I’m in, I’ll make something that doesn’t require a ton of clean up afterwards. But if it does require a lot of clean up, I’ll clean as I prep the food (or put dishes in the sink as I go), so that after I eat, the clean up is short and minimal. And when I make food at home, there’s usually leftover afterwards that I can save for tomorrow or the day after that.

No longer would I spend an hour or more (as I did then on that college night) driving around to find a place to eat. But the benefits of eating out, whether if it’s with friends or family, is that it is a social experience, since it’s a time to converse, laugh, and to catch up with people you might not have seen in months or years. It’s harder to do so when you’re eating alone at home, or if you’re just grabbing something quick to eat during your lunch break.

Of course, one could argue it is cheaper to not eat out, especially when you include tip and the cost of the meal itself (as opposed to making it at home). But then again, eating out can be a fun experience when you want to enjoy a meal and catch up with someone and not have to clean up afterward or spend minutes (or hours) to cook the meal. Besides, eating out depends on who’s going out to eat, right? If you’re driving to your friend’s or family’s home, that’s technically eating out (and vice versa). Or instead of eating out at a restaurant, eating out can be a table at a park, a table at a food court, or just eating in the car while parked in a parking lot during a road trip.