Month: May 2021

They’re not in your pockets. Not in your jacket either. You know that they don’t have feet, can’t walk off on their own. But it’s like they did. Doing that just to annoy you, to make your life more stressful, complicated.

You check the nightstand, which is where you usually leave them at. Right beside the silver-colored lamp. They’re not there, and you don’t have time to find them. You have to head out to work now, but you can’t drive without the car key. Can’t lock the front door without the house key either.

You frantically search for them, scouring through the bedroom, the living room, under the sofa, through the pockets of the pants you wore yesterday. Everywhere, it turns up empty.

Ten minutes past. You’re late for work. You know that traffic gets worse the later you leave. It’s like a mathematical formula: each minute you’re late adds four minutes to your trip. Your heart’s racing, your breathing is tense, nonstop. You feel like you’re going to lose your mind. All because of keys!

As you retrace your footsteps from that morning, as well as from yesterday evening, you suddenly stop. You realize it’s hopeless, that maybe you have to call in sick. Take the day off to find them. Waste precious energy to find something that should’ve been . . .

A light bulb goes off in your mind.

You storm out the front door and run to your car. You stop at the driver-side window and gaze inside. There they are–resting on the carseat. They had been there all night, quietly waiting for your return.

You pull the handle, but it’s locked. How are you going get in? Where is the extra car key? Where had you left it?

Trying to maintain the appearance of normal can be our own worse enemy. It’s like trying to keep the facade nice and shiny, when inside (spiritually, psychological), things are deteriorating, falling apart. There’s that saying: keeping up with the Joneses, even though that might not be where we’re supposed to be. Isn’t everyone in a different spot, in a different stage of life socially, financially, and experientially?

Normal is the average, the middle part of the bell curve. But life isn’t static. We move up and down the curve depending on the changes that occur throughout the months and years. We might suddenly decide to change jobs, move, go back to school, work longer hours, or have unexpected emergency bills.

When the weekend comes, we think we have a reprieve from the work week, from all the effort we put into having things appear as normal. Instead, we catch up on all of the things that didn’t get done during the week, or catching up with family and friends when we attend dinner or social events. See. Everything is normal.

Next week, the bustling starts all over. Week after week, month after month. Does it ever end? Does it only end in retirement?

Maybe it never ends. When we’re retired, we’ll be beset by new challenges, new dilemmas. Health issues, financial ups and downs–whatever. Perhaps the problem was trying to maintain the appearance of normal all along.

Maybe each day isn’t supposed to be normal. Maybe life is about the unexpected curve balls, fast balls, and slow balls that come our way, and swinging (or not swinging) accordingly. Each day isn’t a static routine and experience like the law of gravity. We treat it like is though. Maybe that’s the problem.

When we’re getting by, we’re not pursuing lofty goals or dreams, nor even striving for peace or happiness. We’re just trying to make it through the day. Keep afloat. Trying to make it to work on time, eat a decent lunch, finish up the day’s work. There’s nothing spectacular or special about it. It’s like trying to balance an equation to what equates to normal. Keeping everything together, more or less.

It can be a day filled with hurdles–obstacles that don’t really seem like obstacles to anyone else but us. Things like packing up lunch or trying to make coffee before we head off to work when we have 5 minutes to leave. And on the road, it’s the challenge of beating traffic, snaking through lanes so that we don’t get stuck at a red light. We don’t even have time to enjoy the moment, to smell the roses.

And when the work day is done, even picking up groceries or driving back home can be a challenge. A challenge compounded by exhaustion, fatigue, and the stress we’ve undergone by deadlines and tedious, voluminous work. There’s no chance of getting a moment to relax. Everything is go go go.

And when the sun falls, and the night settles in, we’re still wide awake, stressed about tomorrow. Stressed about getting by–making it another day when it seems like everyone else has it together.

When our day is amiss, it’s like everything’s going wrong, and things our out of step with our normal routine. Maybe we started off the day waking up late. Maybe the computer stopped working. Maybe there was unexpected traffic–delaying our trip to work by minutes.

Whatever the case may be, it makes things more difficult than they ought to be. We tense up, feel annoyed or upset by how things are going. But it doesn’t stop there. The number of things that go amiss begin to snowball and get worse. There’s little we can do to change it as well.

But one thing I often do when things go amiss is to look at the opportunities that are presented. I look at it as a test, a trial–something that upsets the balance of my stable world. So if I’m stuck in traffic, I look at it as an opportunity to straighten out my chaotic thoughts–think about what I need to do for the day. If I forget my keys on my way out the door, I make an effort to put them somewhere where I will remember them next time. If leave for work on a day where it’s pouring rain, I’ll prepare for it next time by leaving my umbrella in the car.

Thus, anytime something goes amiss, I look at it as way to prepare, or at least, to reflect on what I need to do or how I can improve things. Things going amiss is inevitable, but the question is, how will we address it?

Sometimes you wait for something to happen. Hours go by, and then nothing happens.

In life, we have to take action in order to get something done. Whether that’s starting a book, a DIY project at home, cleaning up and organizing things, or even planning a vacation. To get something done, you have to take action. The project on our “To Do List” isn’t going to start it itself.

We might procrastinate and tell ourselves that we’ll get to it later. But will we?

Instead, we spend our time idly watching TV, surfing the internet, or playing games on our cellphone. As a result, hours go by, and we’re still where we were when we hadn’t started.

Sooner or later, our “To Do List” begin to pile up. Instead of hours, days go. What have we accomplished? Why have we procrastinated? Is it because of lack of interest, or is it because we’d rather do what comes easier (or is fun) rather than what requires discipline, work?

By letting the hours go, we let days, even weeks, go by. Instead of that, let’s start on our “To Do List” now. One project at a time.

There are times when you wake up hours before the alarm for work goes off. The sun hadn’t even risen yet. It’s still dark outside. You’re more alert than if you had woken up at your scheduled time.

You have a choice to go back to sleep or to get an early start on the day. It’s like you’ve been given a head start, time that you can use to be productive, creative. It’s time that you can use to get ready for work, to organize paperwork, to clean up and organize your place, or to work on a project.

Waking up early doesn’t happen often, but when it does, you have to decide whether to go back to sleep or to get started on your day–with more time to spare. And the ironic thing is, when you go back to sleep, you might wake up feeling more tired than if you had when the alarm went off.

When we wait for an opportunity to come our way, we lose time for the opportunity we have now. When we bide our time, we think that another opportunity–a better one–will be waiting for us. But what about now? What about all the time we are not using while we wait?

Sometimes it is wise to wait when the conditions are not favorable, such as with making an expensive purchase–waiting for the sale (if it is a seasonal item). It might be good to wait if we are not ready, such as if we’re saving up money, or when we don’t see any good opportunities.

But as we wait, we must work on something–look for opportunities. Each day brings them, and if we’re not paying attention, they will go by and never return.