Indecision

When I play a game of chess, it involves so many decisions in terms of positional strategy, tactics and thinking about what the opponent is up to. Sometimes I just freeze, and it feels like any move I make will worsen my position or just lead to my being checkmated. That’s how it feels when indecision strikes me. I can’t move. I’m stuck.

Indecision is one of those things that is debilitating and frustrating. It comes out of nowhere, and it feels paralyzing when it happens. It can happen for a wide range of situations, such as what attire to wear, what to eat at a restaurant, what career or major to pursue, buying a home or deciding on a place to rent, etc.

We run decisions through a network of ready-made systems and values. The frustrating part is when none of the systems or values can resolve the problem at hand. When it’s overwhelming, we have to step away from the dilemma, hoping that the solution will come to us somehow (or out of thin air).

Sometimes this works when we realize we just needed more time to think about it. Other times, we need to talk it through with someone–get another perspective–another set of systems and values to relay it through.

We might even pray about it, waiting for the answer to come when we’re not expecting it. Or we might decide to let our gut-instinct settle the matter. Regardless of what the solution is, indecision is a paralyzing, and we don’t want it weighing us down.

It can affect all areas of our life. Not only practical matters, but even our creative choices.

In my case, I struggle with things such as the title, how long a story should be, what the story arcs should be, how to conclude the story, and what the series of events should be, etc. Sometimes the answers are very obvious and don’t take long to figure out. At other times, they seem almost impossible to resolve.

When this happens, I take breaks and walk outside to resolve indecisiveness. I find that when I’m working on a problem head-on, I’m fixated on one method or a set of ineffective methods to find the solution. It’s kind of like trying to figure something out with brute force, when what you need is wit, or as that saying goes, thinking outside the box.

I find a change of scenery helps to alleviate the stress and worry of the indecision. Fresh air often calms the mood, and helps us to analyze the problem without the pressure that’s associated with it. The answer can seem almost obvious afterward, like when we say “why didn’t I think of that?” or “of course!”

And if that doesn’t help, I find that talking about it with someone gives us insights we didn’t have to begin with. It’s as our problem-solving systems and judgment-values weren’t sufficient to solve the problem to begin with. It needed some growing, some additions, refinements, and fine-tuning to improve and enhance our decision-making ability.

And then everything is well and fine until the next indecision . . . .